Good ideas

Have you ever had one of those really great ideas that turned out not to be such a great idea after all?

There's a reason tonight's blog is short.

Tomorrow, there will be a photo.

Tonight, I made a cake! I forget that I rarely make cakes, and so the ideas that seem really simple in my head turn out to be much more complicated in real life. I think next year's New Year's Resolution will be to make a cake every week. Or every month. Or more than once a year. It's not the cake itself that's difficult. I made a wonderful chocolate cake two weeks ago. Tonight's cake was simple. It's the decoration that was rather complex.

I also need to buy more icing tips.

I think I scared the girl at Hobby Lobby on Saturday, when I bought my decorating stuff. In addition to the cake-decorating supplies, I also bought scrapbooking, beading, crochet, and sewing supplies. I don't think it's normal to have this many crafting hobbies...

My dog is a cat

It was decided tonight that my dog, Mia, is a cat in disguise. Here are the top ten signs that your dog might be a cat in disguise.

10) She rolls on her back like a kitten. When killing her rubber chicken, Mia rolls onto her back and attacks it with all four paws.

9) She likes to curl up in your lap. Lots of dogs like this, but it's also common to kitties.

8) She grooms your hair. Mia will climb onto Shane's head and lick his hair and rearrange it until she is happy with it. Usually, it comes out looking pretty good.

7) She thinks she can fit in the space between two books on a shelf. Like most cats, my dog seems to think that she's small enough to fit anywhere. This leads to things falling down.

6) She likes to lay in sunbeams. Have you ever read Garfield?

5) She doesn't have any particular fondness for 'people food.' Of course, this could be because I haven't fed her much of it. She's pretty good about being uninterested in plates so far.

4) She thinks she can jump from one piece of furniture to another across the room. Mia will perch on the edge of the chair and just stare at the couch. I'm waiting for her to try it.

3) She sits on window ledges. This is totally a cat thing!

2) She chases birds and bugs. There was a bird in the bush outside a few days ago, and Mia chased it out of the bush and across the parking lot. I don't know what she would have done if she'd actually caught it.

1) She chases laser pointers. And loves it.

My ears are bleeding

I have a Playstation. Technically, it's not mine, it just lives at my place. But I do have games, and those are mostly mine. Among those games are all five editions of SingStar - Rocks, Pop, Amped, 80s and 90s. I love SingStar. Not too long ago, I had a SingStar party, and it was awesome.

Tonight, I had some friends over, and SingStar was discovered. It was not quite so awesome. I think my ears are bleeding, and I'm pretty sure party of my brain ruptured. The puppy howled at one point.

Girls, we need to do SingStar properly again! Tams, if you're reading this, you're included in this 'Girls' bit, because you rocked! The boys... not so much.

Poetry is hard

As you may have noticed, I play D&D. The biggest, longest running campaign I'm involved in is referred to as the Bloodwars game. There are a lot of things going on in the game, but one of the major bits is that there's a battle going on between Hell and the Abyss, and it's started to break through onto Prime (the plane that our characters live in). This is Bad News, because you really don't want devils and demons fighting in your world. It makes a big mess.

Anyways, in Bloodwars, I play a bard, Noori. I really like the character, and I've been told that she's one of the most unique bards that my DM has run into. I'm kind of proud of that. In any case, as a bard, I like to think that Noori is recording all of the party's adventures and writing great epic poems about them.

In our last session, our party killed 33 red dragons. For those of you who don't play, that's a lot. We got a metric crapload of treasure, and lots of dragonhide. I'm really feeling the need to write an epic (or pseudo-epic) poem about this. There's just one problem.

I suck at writing poetry.

I think I'm going to have to pick up the Iliad or the Odyssey again, and see what I can learn, so that I can do justice to the Battle of the Red Dragons. Does anyone out there write poetry? Can you offer any pointers?

Vaccinations suck

I feel awful about having my puppy vaccinated, now that I know how it feels. Most of my vaccines happened when I was too young to really remember properly. Today, my arm hurts, and I feel like I've been hit by a Mack truck.

Actually, I've never been hit by a Mack truck, so I don't really know what it feels like. If I'm being honest, I don't actually know what a Mack truck is...

I Googled it. Go see Mack Trucks. If you're too lazy, here's a picture.


Maybe I don't feel quite that bad. But I'm exhausted.

Of dreams and old ladies

Today, I had a double-take-WTF moment at work. I work for an eye doctor, and sometimes, when I call a patient into the room, they'll have a book or magazine that they've been reading. Occasionally, they leave said item open on their laps while I'm doing the vision testing. On these occasions, I get bored (because eye exams are boring), and nosy (because I'm a writer and want to know everything), and I look down at what the person is reading. Today, the patient in question was a 70-something-year old lady. I looked down at what she was reading (a book), and in a sidebar style box on the left hand page was the title, "So you've decided to suck your own dick." I bet you read that again, didn't you? I had to! But that's what it said! I barely managed not to choke.

Last night (or possibly the night before), I had a crazy dream. I was in this river-y thing, and the water was all murky and nasty, and at the end of the river-y thing was this nasty creature that I was battling. I could only hurt it by throwing dead puppy fetuses at it. The river was full of puppy fetuses and kitty fetuses, but they weren't all dead, so I had to be careful about which ones I picked up, because I was trying to kill the nasty creature to save the live puppies and kitties. I think it's probably a good thing that I don't have a psychiatrist. I can't begin to imagine what that dream might mean...

Five Minute Fiction

From Creative Writing Prompts: #24 Imagine your life is now a book. In 100 words, write the blurb for it. (It's what people will read on the back cover.)

Action. Adventure. Romance. High-speed car chases. At first glance, Danielle looked ordinary, but beneath the surface, she was special. Born and raised a military brat, Danielle’s lifestyle took her around the world and filled her with wonder. Share the ups and downs as she finds love and finds herself. Along the way, meet the dozens of interesting people that she attracts, including several lead singers and a unique group of gamers. How did these different groups manage to find their ways into her life? See how Danielle found these wonderful people and integrated them into her own unique style of storytelling.

Okay, it's 101 words. But not bad, eh?

Rubber chickens

I have been over-cuted in the past two days. Yesterday was Mia's first trip to PetSmart, the local pet store. She was freaking out in the car, whining and crying, because so far, her car trips have ended in needles. When we got out of the car, she got quiet and curious, because we definitely weren't at the vet. Inside, she wanted to sniff everyone and everything, especially the big dogs. She was crazy-excited, and I loved every moment. I ended up getting her some more treats (we were running out), a replacement baby for the one she tore up, a new toss toy, a squeaky rubber chicken, and a toy box.

At home, I set up the toy box, and she immediately climbed into it. Of course. She quickly learned that her toys were all in the box, and that she could take them out. So far, she's been really good about only taking out a few at a time, and I've been putting them back in as soon as she's done, instead of leaving all of the toys out, all of the time.

And then there's the chicken. The rubber chicken was on sale for $3.99. It just seemed like fun - even if Mia didn't like it, I knew that my friend Tony would have fun playing with it. I put it out for her, and this is what happened:

I watched this for over 45 minutes after work today. Every time it squeaked, Mia would make a weird, whimpering noise. I honestly can't tell if she loves it or if she hates it. But it's fun to watch!

I got tagged.

Gee. Thanks, Colby.

A-ATTACHED OR SINGLE? Attached! My Shane is awesome.

B-BEST FRIEND? That's a hard one... I'll go with Donna, because Karen's my sister ;)

C-CAKE or PIE? Another tough one - I'll go with cake, but only because it's faster for me to make. If pie crust were faster, though, it'd totally be pie.

D-DAY of CHOICE? Saturday, because I have two whole days not to worry about work, and the weekend is still full of possibilities

E-ESSENTIAL ITEMS? Phone, iPod, laptop, pen and notebook

F-FAVORITE COLOR? Blue. I think. Although if you looked around at my stuff, you might think it was pink - especially if you looked in the bathroom.

G-GUMMY BEARS OR WORMS? Neither. I'm not really a fan of anything gummy besides Swedish Berries. Mmmm... Swedish Berries....

H-HOMETOWN? Winnipeg, Manitoba - the coldest place on the face of the earth! (Not really, but -52 C will make you think that.)

I-INDULGENCE? Movies. I just did my inventory, and I've got 134 DVDs. That doesn't include TV series, or VHS. Yeesh.

J-JANUARY OR JULY? July, because I'd rather be hot than cold.

K-KIDS? No. No.

L-LIFE ISN’T COMPLETE WITHOUT… people to share it with.

M-MARRIAGE DATE? Don't have one yet, but tonight we talked about having one with a fun number pattern, like 08-08-08, or 03-06-09, or 10-09-08.

N-NUMBER OF SIBLINGS? One, and she totally rocks!

O-ORANGES OR APPLES? Apples all the way.

P-PHOBIAS OR FEARS? Bugs inside my home, really dark places, forest-y places

Q-QUOTE? "Torture - it's the diet coke of evil."

R-REASON TO SMILE? I'm still here!

S-SUPERMAN OR WONDER WOMAN? Neither - I'm not really into superheroes, and I haven't actually seen anything about either of them.

T-TAG 5 PEOPLE. Karen, Heather, Shane, Claire, and JJ

U-UNKNOWN FACT ABOUT ME? My favourite birthday present last year was a big box of office supplies.

V-VEGETABLES? Fruits? I totally don't get this one! Plus, I don't like many veggies.

W-WORST HABIT? I sort everything. EVERYTHING.

X-RAY OR ULTRASOUND? Both are useful... but MRIs rock even more.

Y-YOUR FAVORITE FOOD? Chocolate. And potatoes.

Z-ZODIAC SIGN? Libra - see? There's a good reason for my indecisiveness!

Gamers are odd...

The Bloodwars group met again tonight, and had a grand time slaying red dragons. Of course, the session included much chitchat and far too many bad puns. As everyone was clearing out, I was handed a folder and told to look over it, because it was a set of rules that I had never seen.

It was "The Complete Guide to Unlawful Carnal Knowledge." Yes, it was the guide on how to use sex and porn in a d20 game.

Gamers are weird.

Gamers are odd

This is what happened tonight. We were going to play D&D. Instead of playing out a normal session, we spent the evening leveling our characters and purchasing new items with all the loot we picked up in our last adventure. Then we sat around talking for hours. Late into the night, Matt came up with this...

I don't really know how it started. But it made several people fall over laughing the first time. And one person turned purple because she was laughing so much she could barely breathe. It was beautiful.

Eyes bleeding...

Have you ever sat at a computer screen long enough, trying to figure things out, that it feels as if your eyes are about to start bleeding?

Immigration is complicated. And I'm not even trying to immigrate! I just want to work.

The evil Mobius strip of a sentence

I was out for dinner with Shane tonight, and he pointed out that the sentence on the sign on the table was driving him crazy. He called it 'the evil Mobius strip of a sentence.' He then turned it around to share the pain with me.

"You make them favorites.
Time made it a classic."

WTF? The lack of parallelism in that phrase is appalling! Aside from the disagreement in numbers (it vs. them) and the disagreement in verb tense (make vs. made), it just hurts! It's not a pretty sentence. I don't like it. If you're going to be in advertising, make sure that at least one member of your team has a freaking English degree!! See? You should be able to do something with a BA in English.

This got me reflecting on the general grammar quality (or lack thereof) that I see all around me today. The language is being butchered by pop culture and ignorance. Now, I'll admit, I do use some acronyms that are prevalent (WTF, above, is a prime example). However, the majority of what I say is actually made up of real words. I will also admit that I make up words - these words get made up from the Greek and Latin roots that I learned while earning my BA in Classics. I don't randomly string letters together and call them words.

As my high school English teacher used to tell us, when you're a published author, you are allowed to selectively ignore grammatical points in favour of style. Until then, use the damn language the way it was meant to be used!! I am a published author. When I butcher English, I'm doing it to reinforce a point, make a stylistic choice, or I'm really drunk and can't tell whether I'm speaking in English or French (they have different grammatical rules). Joe Schmoe on the street, telling his girl to "stufu, noob," is making stylistic choices as an author. He's an idiot. And he sounds like an idiot.

On an unrelated note, last night Mordthor sent another spy to check out my television habits. Luckily, I managed to remove the roach before he could report back to the Dark One. Colby, we've got to come up with a plan to eliminate Mordthor. For good.

I love my sister!

That's all. I love my sister. It was awesome talking to her tonight.

Five minute... list?

From Creative Writing Prompts: #255 Come up with 12 good reasons to sleep in.

1) You partied hard last night.
2) You don't have to work today.
3) You plan to stay up late tonight.
4) You're on vacation.
5) It's the weekend.
6) You've worked hard all your life, and you've earned it.
7) You've studied hard all year long, and you've earned it.
8) Your husband/wife is sleeping in.
9) Your dog is sleeping in.
10) You know that sleep is good for you.
11) All of your plans for the day are flexible.
12) You have nothing better to do.

Five Minute Fiction

From Creative Writing Prompts: #168 Secretary has a weird way of classifying the files.



"Eleanor!"


There was no response.


"Eleanor!" called Mr. McCurdy again, getting irritated. "She must have gone to lunch," he muttered. What was she thinking, going for lunch at noon? What if he had needed her, like he did now? With his secretary off enjoying a meal somewhere, he was going to have to find the file he needed. It seemed beneath him - imagine, a lawyer going through the trouble of finding a file! That's what secretaries were for, after all.


Still grumbling to himself, Mr. McCurdy left his comfy leather chair and waddled up to the reception area and the shelves of files behind it. He figured that if Eleanor did this every day, he could manage. After all, he knew the alphabet. He needed the file about Arnold Lewis's case, so he decided to look under 'L'. He picked a spot about halfway into the files and started to look at the cases on the shelf.


"Nabar, Kreutz, Abercomb, Miller..." he read. "Wait a second... Nabar, Kreutz, Abercomb and Miller?" He knew that Eleanor was not the brightest bulb in the Christmas tree, but that was ridiculously out of order! He moved to the first row of files and began reading off the names.


"Zellman, Stiller, Umphrey, Token..." There was definitely something wrong here! He looked at another shelf, but still saw no pattern to any of the files.


Getting grumpier by the second, Mr. McCurdy finally stomped over to the reception desk and scribbled a note for Eleanor before stomping back to his own office. Only a few minutes later, the wayward secretary returned from lunch and promptly went to Mr. McCurdy's office, Lewis file in hand.


"How did you manage to find this in that mess?" Mr. McCurdy asked, partly annoyed but partly amazed.


"I've got a system," Eleanor said with a grin. "Makes me indispensible."

Five Minute Fiction

From Creative Writing Prompts: #231 List the 7 worst things to say to a person who just got dumped.

7) "Here's a kitten - you'll need the company. Here, take three more."

6) "Seven year itch, seven week itch... it's all the same."

5) "You wouldn't have wanted to raise another man's baby anyways."

4) "You know, he might take you back if you got your sister into bed with the two of you."

3) "So do you mind if I have a go now?"

2) "Bet you wish you'd got those implants after all!"

1) "Whoa! I can't believe it took him so long!"

So many posts!

I'm at 62 consecutive posts with tonight's blog! And I started this blog on April 13, so I've made it for two full months! Hurray! I'm getting to be very impressed with myself. I wonder what I should do to celebrate when I hit 100...

...

...

It would seem that I should start planning this now, as I appear to have a case of writer's block tonight. Is it okay if I blame my sister for this? She liked the picnic story, and told me that my next post needed to be just as good - the pressure!

Except that I usually write better under pressure...

I'll blame it on D&D! We ran a Bloodwars session tonight after working all day... five hours of game is awesome, but leaves me exhausted, especially after a full day of work. There will be more game tomorrow, but first, there will be much sleep. Mmmm... Sleep...

Preview!

I know that you loyal blog readers are here simply to read what I write - I know that you wait with eager anticipation for each character that I type onto the screen, anxious to see what gems will spill forth today...


I know that's a load of baloney, but hey, a girl can dream, right?



Anyways, as a reward for reading my often-rambling blog, I'm giving you all a preview... Here are some samples of the items that will be appearing in my Etsy store. Don't rush over there yet! I don't actually have anything posted. I was originally going to wait and just put up a bunch of NaNo-related stuff to help me recoup the costs of the goody bags for the WriMos, but I found some lovely beads on sale today, so I've decided to make some more earrings. They'll be cheap - probably $3-5 a pair - but they're pretty and nice for everyday wear. Comments and suggestions are always welcome!

Video time...

Every time it rains, my internet goes out. *pouts*

Five Minute Fiction

From Creative Writing Prompts" #76: Write the story of a disastrous family picnic.

It all started out so well. It was a beautiful day in late spring, and George finally had some free time. No work, no chores - it was a completely free day.

"Sally," George said to his wife, "I think we need to go on a picnic."

"What a fabulous idea!" Sally exclaimed. "Let me round up the children."

Of course, what would a family picnic be without tag-alongs? Each of the children wanted to bring a friend or two, and what was going to be a quiet family picnic started to turn into a rather boisterous party. Still, George was in a good mood, and wasn't fazed by any of it. "We'll just have to find a bigger blanket," he told Sally, grinning.

The family started off down the hill, walking in single file behind George. He sighed happily as the sun beat down on him, enjoying the fresh air. "Doesn't it feel good to be outside?" he asked Sally.

"Definitely," she agreed, somewhat distracted by the gaggle of youngsters behind them. "Stay in line, kids!"

It was a long walk to the picnic site, but the family was in good shape, and no one seemed to mind. Once they had arrived, it took little time for the children to start swarming all over the food.

"Kids! Be careful!" George shouted. "One at a time! Stay in single file!"

But his warning came too late. From above them came a terrible shriek. A young woman nearly leapt off of her picnic blanket. "ANTS!" she screeched, doing a strange little dance, as if that would convince them to leave.

"I'll take care of it," her date said, lifting up the plate and carelessly sweeping George's children to the ground.

"Nooooo!" Sally cried, but the man couldn't hear her. Deftly, he grabbed one corner of the picnic blanket and flicked it, sending George, Sally, and the kids flying across the park.

His head throbbing, George looked up at the blue sky. He could see the couple leaving, but he didn't see the rest of his family. He would definitely think twice before taking his family on another picnic.

The Wounded Boar's Nuts

Ha! I see I caught your attention with this snazzy title! And I didn't even make it up myself... it was the name of a tavern that a group of us ran into tonight while playing a pick-up game of D&D. It was an interesting game, to say the least. There are some people that I don't think I'll game with on a regular basis, simply because I prefer to co-operative group dynamic that the Bloodwars campaign has. Okay, enough D&D geeking.

Time for crafting/novelling geekiness! I've got a pattern in my head, and I think I can totally make it work. However, I've though this before, and it's been a horrible mess. I'm getting better at crochet, but I can't always picture how something will be affected by a particular type of increase or decrease, so if I'm not working with a pattern, I'm completely flying by the seat of my pants. I think that I've figured out how to make a plot ninja. For those of you who don't know what plot ninjas are, try visiting NaNoWriMo. If you're too lazy to go there and search, I'll explain. Plot ninjas are those weird little things that you throw into a book/story because there's nothing else to do. During NaNoWriMo, you are actually encouraged to randomly throw ninjas into your story when you hit a block, because it forces your characters to do something. Or get killed by the ninjas. Either way, the ninjas will get removed in the second draft, because by then, you'll have figured out a way to get from point A to point B without ninjas (or you'll have abandoned the whole book entirely). Last year, I made some plot bunnies (cute fuzzy things that pop up in your story and make it more interesting), and gave them to some fellow WriMos. This year, I'm planning to make several more plot bunnies and plot ninjas, and sell them through Etsy to finance the NaNoWriMo goody bags (thanks for pointing out the site, Jonathan!).

So the moral of today's post? There isn't one. Don't look for it. But watch out for the ninjas.

Things on my desk

It's late, I'm tired, and I'm not feeling particularly creative at the moment - I spent all day playing with cards and my new Cricut machine. So instead of the usual blathering or five-minute fiction, today, I'm giving you a look at some of the things you'll find on my computer desk.

I've got two shelves above the computer, and they have some fairly standard stuff - manuals and programs, blank cds, a pen holder full of pens, pencils, and highlighters. There's also a Webster's Dictionary, my Descriptionary: A Thematic Dictionary, and two baby name books - all supplies for writing. Note the lack of a thesaurus. I don't really like thesauri, except for saying the name.

On the desktop are the more interesting bits. I've got my Rolodex, which is in desperate need of an update (note: if you are my friend, you should send me your info, so I can update the Rolodex!). Along the same lines is my Anne Geddes birthday book, which also needs updating. I've got a pen holder that has two pairs of scissors, three pens, and a post-it pad. I have a nifty green and white paperclip holder that Shane gave me for my birthday. I've got a half-naked Scotsman (it's a coaster, from Claire). There's a big-ass pile of those little black clippy things for big piles of paper, leftover from last year's NaNo goody bags (and probably ready to be recycled for this year's goody bags). I have a box of AntiViral Kleenex, because you want AntiViral things around the computer. Last, but not least, is my plot bunny, a cute little critter that arose from the NaNo forums. If you don't know what this NaNo thing is, go check it out: National Novel Writing Month.

I'm sure there are some other little things, but it's dark, and they're probably not that interesting anyways.

Five minute fiction

From LiveJournal's Writer's Block: What should cheese go on, and what should cheese NOT go on?

Cheese is a very ubiquitous food. It can be found in almost every country around the world, and it comes in a multitude of varieties. It's usually yellowish in colour, but it ranges from pale, almost-white yellow to deep oranges. This range of colour makes it an excellent topping for many types of foods: salads are always more appealing with two or more types of cheese on top. Plus, cheese has a nice taste that hides the blandness of lettuce.

Hamburgers are frequently topped with cheese - this, of course, makes a hamburger into a cheeseburger. Chicken burgers, however, should not be covered in cheese. While chicken can, in some forms, benefit from a cheesy partner (mmm... chicken parmesan...), it generally doesn't play well with cheese. Ham, in sandwich form, is a classic cheese partner, while other pork products aren't as favoured.

Most vegetables go well with cheese, either in slice form or in sauce form. Anyone who has been to a fondue restaurant knows this well. Fruit, however, is not as compatible. Some fruits, like grapes, may be happy living on the same plate as cheese, but this usually occurs at wine-and-cheese functions, and is not recommended for daily pairings.

Cheese and chocolate are a definite no. That is not something that anyone should attempt.

Habit forming...

They say it takes 21 days to form a habit. I'm not entirely sure who 'they' are, or how they came to this conclusion. However, if you Google "days to form a habit," you'll find an awful lot of websites that tell you that it will take 21 days to form a habit. A few claim it's 30 days, and some say 28.

Whatever. In any case, be it 21, 28, or 30 days, I think that I have blogged consistantly enough for it to be a habit. I blog at the same time every night (more or less), at least relative to the time I go to bed. At first, it was a novelty, and I loved it. After a few days, blogging felt like a chore, but I slogged through. Now, it's about as much of my routine as putting on pyjamas. (Yes, I wear pyjamas to bed. And I spell 'pyjamas' with a Y. I'm Canadian, I spell funny - get over it.) I think I need to start flossing my teeth as regularly as I blog. My dentist would like that.

So now that this comes more naturally (timing-wise, if not idea-wise), I've been thinking about other habits I could form. And before you go suggesting it, no, I don't want to form a drug habit. Besides, from what I've seen and heard, you don't have to waste 21 days to form that one.

I could incorporate daily knitting into my schedule. I do craft a lot, but not during the week. I think I'm just too tired after working all day. Perhaps a napping habit would be beneficial. A nap is always a good idea, isn't it?

The problem with habit-formation is that it actually takes effort to form any worthwhile habit, and, well, I'm kind of lazy.

I think I'll just be proud of my blogging habit for a while longer.

Yarn is wonderful

I bought more yarn today. Anyone who has seen my yarn collection may be wondering why I could possibly think that I need more. Someday, I will post a photo of my yarn collection, but only after I finish a few more projects and use up some of it - I don't think it will all fit into one photo.

I've got so many projects on the go right now... I feel a need to inventory them. Feel free to make requests or comments. I work best with a deadline ;)

- Toque for James
- Yellow/white baby blanket for Joy
- Red seat cover for my car
- Poncho for Jonathan
- Purple sparkly dice bag (anyone interested?)
- Pink/white granny square blanket (twin-size, anyone interested?)
- Purple/pink/white wave blanket for me
- Purple/blue/white baby blanket (for whoever's next!)
- Blue sweater for me
- Rainbow i-cord that has no purpose whatsoever except looking cool
- Brown/gold shawl (anyone interested?)
- A multitude of plot bunnies for NaNo sales
- Weekly greeting cards for my sisters
- Warhammer miniatures to paint (lots and lots and lots)

Huh. It doesn't look that bad. I must have forgotten some! But now that I see the list, I feel that I must start getting things done and proving to the world that I can finish stuff! I think the car seat cover will get done first - I almost burned the skin off of my back the last time I tried to drive! Darn vinyl/pleather seats!

Hockey!

Short post, because I was watching the final game of the Stanley Cup tonight. Go hockey! Go Jets! (Yes, I know that the Jets have been gone for, like, ten years. I don't care. Go Jets!)

My favourite part of tonight's game? In the third period, when Detroit got their third goal against Pittsburgh. I can't recall who made the shot on goal, but EVERYONE thought that the goalie (Marc-Andre Fleury) had the puck. EVERYONE. It turns out, he didn't. The puck slid between his knees and stopped before crossing the goal line. However. He got knocked backwards and landed, butt-first, on the puck. On the edge of the puck. This sent the puck flying into the goal, and Detroit got the point. I loved it!

Bubbles

I didn't know what to write about for tonight's blog, so I asked Shane for a suggestion. His topic? Bubbles.



Bubbles. What a crazy topic! The first thing I think of when I think of bubbles is that little dude from Finding Nemo. You know, the one named Bubbles? The yellow guy who got so excited when the bubbles would come out of the treasure chest.
This guy.

Anyways, I started thinking that it would be really cool to be so excited about something that everyone else finds mundane. Then I realized that most people probably get excited about something that other people think is boring or weird. D&D is a good example - gamers love it, and get really into it, but everyone else thinks we're kind of crazy.

I get excited about weird things, like finding a set of number labels that I could use to identify all the bankers boxes that I use to pack every time I move. Or finding more bankers boxes at a great price. Or finding earring-sized jewelry boxes and matching cotton-y inserts. Or huge rolls of bubble wrap. Or pretty much anything I found in the U-line shipping supply catalog. Boxes and ribbons and paper and pens and the like really, really, really make me happy. For my birthday last year, Shane gave me a bunch of office supplies, including pushpins, CD holders, a box of pens, and a crapload of magnets. It was probably one of the best birthday presents ever! Most other people would have been very disappointed, but I loved it.

So there we go. A post (partly) about bubbles. And Bubbles. And bubble wrap.

I'm not dead!

I kind of felt like I might be when I woke up this morning... Heat exhaustion is no fun at all! So to help everyone else out there avoid the same fate that befell me, here's a top ten list: Top Ten Ways to Get Out of Helping Someone Move

10. Swear that you're allergic to the chemicals in their new carpets or paint, and that simply being within a hundred yards of the new place will cause you to go into anaphylactic shock.

9. Tell them that you would love to, but you have to wash your hair; one strand at a time, because it's time for your annual hair-care weekend.

8. Offer to help, then stack the biggest box of books you can find on top of the smallest box labeled 'fragile' - trust me, they won't ask you back!

7. Show up wearing high heels and a mini skirt. Especially if you're a man.

6. Offer to send three friends in your place, and hire three old ladies from the nursing home down the street to pose as your friends.

5. Claim that the olives told you that you're not supposed to lift anything heavier than a sandwich for the next 24 hours, then smash the olives. (Trust me, after four hours of hauling boxes and furniture in 90 degree weather with no AC, the olives will be talking to someone!)

4. Fake a broken leg. Go all out and visit an emergency room and ask them to put a cast on, just for the day. Show up for work the next day without the cast, and talk about your miracle healing powers.

3. Show up acting drunk. Nobody wants a drunk person hauling their personal items up and down stairs. More importantly, nobody wants to haul a drunk person up or down stairs after hauling all of their personal items around!

2. Claim that the medication you're taking makes you sensitive to temperature, while wearing a sweater and carrying an ice pack.

And the number one way to get out of helping someone move... JUST SAY NO! (Hey, it's supposed to work for drugs, right? Moving involves just as much peer pressure!)

Manditory blog

I'm tired and sore and cranky. I helped Jason move today, but his A/C was out. We packed and moved in very hot weather, and I think everyone involved has heatstroke. I'm not sure I'll make it to work tomorrow, that's how dizzy and nauseous I am at the moment. Please forgive the half-assed blog - I couldn't bear to break my streak of posting. I promise, tomorrow will be longer, if not better.

EDIT: I just realized this has been my 50th consecutive blog post. I'm sad that it wasn't better.